How to Communicate Effectively With Others

If everyone was able to understand exactly what you were trying to say each and every time you were communicating, you would certainly encounter less friction in your interactions. Unfortunately, clear, effective communication isn’t always as simple as we take it to be.

effective communication

The good news though, is that, like anything else, communication can be improved to help strengthen your relationships, your business partnerships, and your social interactions.

How to Communicate Effectively

Effective communication is one of the cornerstones of a lasting relationship. Without it, you will inevitably find your relationship on troubled waters.

In order to improve the communication that takes place in any relationship, try these following things.

1. Talk Face to Face

Texts, phone calls, and emails are great for convenience and staying in touch when you’re apart, but for serious, useful communication you are going to want to be face-to-face with your partner. Take time to talk with them in-person, and avoid becoming too reliant on technology as a means of communicating.

2. Say “We”

You and your partner are a team, and your word choice needs to convey that. Saying “we” instead of “you” or “I” can also help keep what you say from coming across as critical or aggressive since you are directing it at both of you.

3. Be Honest

A relationship is not the place for purposefully confusing your partner or playing mind games with them. When the goal is to communicate as clearly as possible, you need to be as upfront and honest as possible at all times – even when it is difficult.

Whether you are communicating with your boss or communicating with your employees, good communication is essential in order for a workplace to run smoothly and efficiently.

4. Read Over Your Messages Before You Send Them

Far too often people get in too big of a hurry in the workplace. They will quickly type out and hit send on a message before they have taken the time to read over it carefully. A simple reading, though, might have shown them errors that could cause the message to be misconstrued. Before you send out any email or memo, take the time to analyze it and make sure it is clearly communicating your intended message.

5. Follow Up

Sometimes in business, you are going to have to follow up with people in order to get your message across.

People are busy, and they may not take your message as seriously as they should unless you mention it to them again. If possible, follow up communications should always take place in-person.

Finally, social interactions are often the situations where communications get misunderstood the most. Perhaps it’s the lighthearted nature of these situations where no one is really giving their full focus to the speaker, or perhaps it’s the fact that social interactions often have so many speakers at one time. Here are a few ways you can communicate more clearly in social interactions.

6. Be a Good Listener

One common problem with the communication that takes place in social interactions is that everyone present wants to be the speaker and no one really wants to be the listener. By carefully listening to what others are saying, though, you can ensure that your input is more relevant to the conversation at hand and thus more likely to be well-received.

7. Let it Pass

Have you ever been in a social interaction where you think of something really clever or important to say, but once you actually get the chance to speak the conversation has shifted? It may be tempting to interject your comment anyway in instances such as this, and many people often do.

However, the comment will rarely ever carry the same weight after the conversation has shifted to something else, and it is likely to be misunderstood. It is better to let it pass and keep up with the flow of conversation.

8. Practice Body Language

Body language is important in all communication scenarios, but especially in social interactions. Keep your eyes on the person who is speaking, nod and smile appropriately, and show them that you are engaged lest they get the impression that you aren’t interested in what they have to say.

When it is your turn to speak, don’t be afraid to use body language such as eye contact and gestures to command the attention of your audience. The closer they pay attention to what you say the more likely they are to understand what it is you are trying to get across.

In almost every aspect of life, communicating effectively and clearly is vitally important. Some people are natural communicators, while others struggle to translate their thoughts in a way that those listening will understand.

Most all of us, though, have room for improvement. By putting a little effort into your communication skills, you can improve the quality of both your personal, your social, and your business interactions.

Do you have any tips for effective communication I might have missed? Share them in the comments. Learn your true potential for leadership and communication from this 60-second leadership quiz.

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Why Writing a Book Was The Wisest Thing I Ever Did & Why You Should Write Your Own

Do you have a message to share with the world? Is there something you want to change or something you want to do to make a difference in the world? Do you want to elevate and expand your business, or build your brand, your credibility and your authority in your industry? Well there’s one thing that can satisfy all of these things. Have you ever thought about learning how to write a book?

how to write a book

I want to share with you why writing a book was the wisest things I ever did. Many people don’t realize all of the benefits that writing a book can have. Not only did it help me share a message; it catapulted my professional career to whole new levels.

My First Book…

The first book I wrote when I was in my thirties was 100 Ways to Enhance Self-Concept in the Classroom. It made me an expert in the field of building self-esteem in the schools. As a result I was asked to speak at state and national conferences all over the United States and Canada. I got to travel, work with dedicated professionals who wanted to improve education, and earned a much higher income than I would have made as a classroom teacher or a therapist in private practice.

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When I wrote and compiled Chicken Soup for the Soul, it totally changed my life. In less than three years, I went from making $140,000 a year to $6 million a year.

My speaking fees went through the roof, and I was treated to first class travel and accommodations. When the book started being translated into what would become more than 50 languages, I was invited to speak all over the world in some of the most beautiful and exotic destinations you can imagine, and sometimes to audiences as large as 10,000 people.

I was also interviewed on every major television show from Oprah and Montel to the Today Show and Larry King Live.

But most importantly, the satisfaction that came from the impact I was having also increased.

There were days when I would receive 100 letters telling me how the book (and later all the Chicken Soup books) had made a difference in their lives—everything from people who decided not to commit suicide to people saying how the books had got them through their cancer or encouraged them to start a business they had always dreamed of.

How to Get Started and How to Make Writing a Book a Success

1. Declare yourself an author NOW

Come up with a working title for your book and start telling people you’re the author of the “upcoming book titled XYZ.” One big reason to do this is it will create positive momentum for you. Once you start telling people you’ve got a book coming out, it makes it much easier to get it done. Plus, you can start enjoying some of the ancillary benefits of being an author, such as getting publicity on radio/TV, print publications and online. As with many things in life the key is to just get started – even if you don’t feel quite ready.

2. Be selfish with your time 

Writing a book is important – to you, your family and your future – and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Share your goal with your spouse, your parents and your friends. Ask them to help you create the time to write, even if it’s just 15 minutes every day. Create the habit. Good or bad, habits always deliver results. If you only write one page a day, in a year, you will have written 365 pages—more than enough for a book!

3. Find your message 

There is a book inside of you. It might be a business book, a memoir, a cookbook or something funny, a how-to or how-not to, a what-for or why-not. What are you good at? What is your passion? What can you teach other people to do?

4. Identify your niche

Who needs to learn what you have to teach? Who would be most interested in your story? Get specific. For example, the Chicken Soup series includes Chicken Soup for the Christian Woman’s Soul, Chicken Soup for the Military Wife’s Soul, Chicken Soup for the Working Woman’s Soul and others. Knowing your niche will help you write the book and market it.

5. Consider co-authors 

Think a whole book is too much work? Get a co-author. I had co-authors on my Chicken Soup books. That person can share in the writing and, later, in marketing the book.

6. Think marketing from day one

One of the biggest mistakes most new authors make is to spend all their time and energy writing the book, without sufficient thought to how they’ll market it. Ideally, you want to consider marketing issues while writing your book. For instance, consider short snappy chapter titles which easily lend themselves to being blog posts and/or radio/TV show segments.

7. Meditate on problems

This might sound counter-intuitive. When you meditate, you try to relax, right? Well, not really. Meditating is harnessing your brain power and if you focus that energy on the problems you encounter – and every creative venture encounters problems – you’ll solve them. Meditate, go for a long walk or take a hot bath. Give your mind a problem to solve and give it the room to do so, and it will. That’s how I came up with the title Chicken Soup for the Soul.

Take Action

If you have an idea or valuable information and expertise inside you, or if have a business that you want to promote or expand, you can definitely benefit from writing a book. I want you to think about your business. Think about your career. How could a book help you?

Writing a book was the launching point for me to start training others my Success Principles. Often when you write a book and are an expert in your field, people will ask for you expertise and training so they can be successful. I’d like to show you my approach to training others and how becoming a trainer my be the career path you’ve been looking for.

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5 Ways to Increase Self-Confidence & Self-Esteem

Do people with high self-esteem achieve greater success?

“I need to increase my self-esteem” is a statement I hear often from my students. Their belief is that once their self-confidence and self-esteem is higher, they’ll be able to achieve more and become greater successes.

woman with high self-esteem and confidence raises arms on balcony

 

While it’s true that a high self-esteem can assist you in creating the life you dream of, the mistake most people make is how they think about self-esteem. It’s not a thing to be increased or decreased, although that is the common terminology. Instead, self-esteem is a verb; it’s the process of esteeming yourself.

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, esteem means “to set a high value on: regard highly and prize accordingly.”

In other words, the process of boosting your self-esteem starts with deciding that you are valuable and treating yourself as such.

Learn how to develop unshakable self-confidence at Breakthrough to Success!

5 Good Habits to Build Great Self-Esteem

1) Believe in Yourself  

The first step in creating greater self-esteem is to believe in yourself. It’s your responsibility to take charge of your own self-concept and your beliefs – including belief in your worth, your talent, your abilities, and your potential.

2) Identify 9 Major Successes  

Research has repeatedly shown that the more you acknowledge your past success, the more confident you become in taking on and successfully accomplishing new ones. A simple way to start this process is to take an inventory of your major success. Divide your life into three time periods – from birth to 15, 16 to 30, and 31 to 45. The list three major successes from each time period.

Divide your life into three time periods – from birth to 15, 16 to 30, and 31 to 45. Then list three major successes from each time period.

To really convince yourself that you’re a successful person who can continue to achieve great things, keep going with your list.

See if you can identify 100 or more of your life successes.

3) Keep a Victory Log

Recall and write down your successes each day. This will log them into your long-term memory, enhancing your self-esteem and self-confidence. Whenever you need a boost of self-confidence, reread what you have written. Keeping and referring to your victory log keeps you focused on your successes instead.

Keeping and referring to your victory log keeps you focused on your successes instead.

4) Display Success Symbols

What you see in your environment has a psychological impact on your moods, attitudes, and behavior. Surround yourself with awards, pictures and other objects that remind you of your successes. Create a special place in your home – such as a hallway, shelf or even the top of your refrigerator – to display your symbols. This will subtly program you to see yourself as someone who has consistent successes in life.

5) Keep Your Agreements

One of the most commonly overlooked ways to boost self-esteem is to keep your word. Every agreement you make is to yourself, ultimately, even those that involve other people. Your brain registers agreements as commitments. If you don’t follow through, you learn to not trust yourself. You lose integrity and faith in your ability to produce a result. Don’t undermine your sense of personal power – keep your commitments.

Increase Your Capacity to Take a Risk

To understand the importance of esteeming yourself, imagine you were playing poker. If you have 10 chips and I have 200 chips, who do you think will play more conservatively?

You will, of course, because the stakes are higher for you. Two losing bets of five chips each would put you out of the game. I, on the other hand, could lose five chips 40 times before I was out.

Your self-esteem is like a stack of poker chips. The higher it is, the more willing and able you are to take the risks that will lead you to greater success.

Use the ideas shared in this article to create and maintain the high levels of self-esteem you need to get where you want to be.

Self-Confidence and Your Ideal Future is Within Your Grasp

Your ideal future is within your grasp – you simply have to reach out and grab it. I want to give you the tools you need to make that happen.

If you really want to take control of your life and inject it with unprecedented amounts of happiness, financial success, a sense of accomplishment, the ability to help others, and a real sense of purpose and satisfaction — the time to act is now. Join me for 5 days of hands-on training with me during Breakthrough to Success!

During this one of a kind workshop, I promise you one thing… you’ll leave feeling transformed, and ready to make a massive impact on the world. BTS 2017 is 5 days of hands-on training with me, LIVE and in-person. I’ll be there, holding you accountable, and guiding you each step of the way toward your own personal evolution. Click the button below to learn more.


 WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEBSITE?
You can, as long as you include this complete statement with it: Jack Canfield, America’s #1 Success Coach, is founder of the billion-dollar book brand Chicken Soup for the Soul® and a leading authority on Peak Performance and Life Success. If you’re ready to jump-start your life, make more money, and have more fun and joy in all that you do, get FREE success tips from Jack Canfield now at: www.JackCanfield.com

We’re on a mission to change the world. Care to join us?

Five years ago, I had a vision.

I dreamed of creating a team of people who could bring my powerful Success Principles to people from all walks of life and in every corner of the globe – so that everyone could have the opportunity to become their best self and live their true purpose. (Just imagine the impact that would have on the world!)

Since then, I’ve trained over 1,200 people to teach my proven success strategies to others. It’s so exciting to see them go back to places where I’ll never visit – and teach people how to create lives of greater joy, abundance, and meaning.

Now my team and I are ready to take this mission to the next level – and we’d love for you to join us!

If you’ve been searching for a way to empower yourself and make a profound positive impact on the world – while transforming your own life in the process – this could be the opportunity you’ve been looking for.

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Learn how YOU can become “one in a million” and join us on our quest to change the world…

Click-to-Learn-More

Everyone has the capacity to be a teacher.

It doesn’t matter who you are or what you do – whether you’re a corporate office worker, business owner, freelancer, stay-at-home parent, mechanic, or whatever – by mastering the Success Principles and learning how to teach them to others, you can radically change people’s lives for the better (including your own).

Here’s your chance to shine your light – and make the world a brighter place. Won’t you join us?

 

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Write a Book and Get It Published. (Yes, You!) Seven Key Strategies for Getting Started

Young people and education, woman studying for university testI’m about to tell you do something and you’ll think I’m crazy. Ready? Here goes: You should write a book.

I know, I know. You don’t need one more “to do” on your list. You have the pets, the kids, your job, possibly a significant other and their job, your house, this, that and the other. You don’t have the time or energy to put towards writing a book. Why would you put another “to do” on your list?

Publishing a book is more than a way to share your message and wisdom with others. It’s also a tremendous marketing tool. After all, no matter your industry or profession, everyone wants to do business with the person who “wrote the book.” Becoming a published author positions you as an expert and instantly affords you the type of credibility which can skyrocket your career to a whole new level.

Yes, you need a blueprint on how to create a success. But don’t think for a minute that you can’t learn how to do it. You can – and publishing a book will change your life. It changed mine.

In 1967, I was working as a social studies teacher at Calumet High School in Chicago. It was a rough school in a rough part of town at a rough time in history. Dr. Martin Luther King was assassinated during the spring of that school year, on April 4, 1968, and we had a full scale riot in the school the next day.

The next year, I moved to Clinton, Iowa to take a job with the Clinton Job Corps Center, where I taught basic reading, math and job skills to women who had dropped out of school. I say “women” but many of them were just kids. They were 16-23 years-old and mostly women of color. Life was tough for them. But neither racial conflict, crime, nor poverty was the biggest problems of the women in Clinton or the kids in Chicago. What was? Low self-esteem! If you don’t believe in yourself, you’ll never find the motivation to change your life for the better.

Wanting to help these people, I worked with W. Clement Stone, who had a foundation at which I learned how to teach people self-esteem and self-motivation. He was one of my teachers and I’ll tell you more about the importance of teachers in a minute.

From Stone, I got motivated to go to graduate school and, later, I got a contract for an educational book about motivating students in the classroom. Great that I got a book deal, right? Well, I still had to write the book.

Picture this. It’s now 1975 and I’m working and going to school to support my wife and new-born baby. Now I have to write a book titled 100 Ways to Enhance Self-Concept in the Classroom – and I only have 20 ways. So I came up with a strategy, a blueprint really, for creating the book. I sat in my kitchen at a “desk” made of two filing cabinets with a hollow core door on top on which I put my IBM Selectric typewriter. And then I wrote one way to build self-confidence and self-esteem for the classroom every 3 ½ days. That equaled two ways a week and 100 by the end of the year.

Know what? The plan worked. The book sold 400,000 copies and became a bestseller. My life changed quickly and for the better. I became a consultant to school districts, spoke at educational conferences and made more money to support my family. I felt fulfilled creatively and motivated professionally because I was on the right path.

The path that started in that little kitchen led to me co-authoring the Chicken Soup for the Soul series. The books have sold over 123 million copies in North America with more than 500 million copies in print worldwide. But even that took a strategy for success. Many, many people said that Chicken Soup would never work as a book. It was initially rejected by 144 publishers. When I finally did get a publisher, he said we’d be lucky to sell 20,000 books. I told him my goal was to sell a million-and-a-half in the first 18 months. He laughed and said I was crazy. Well, today he laughs on his private jet!

Here’s what I know: If you have a plan and the right teachers, you too can become a successful author.

Here’s how to get started and make your book a success:

1 – Declare yourself an author NOW. Come up with a working title for your book and start telling people you’re the author of the “upcoming book titled XYZ.” One big reason to do this is it will create positive momentum for you. Once you start telling people you’ve got a book coming out, it makes it much easier to get it done. Plus, you can start enjoying some of the ancillary benefits of being an author, such as getting publicity on radio/TV, print publications and online. As with many things in life the key is to just get started – even if you don’t feel quite ready.

2 – Be selfish with your time. Writing a book is important – to you, your family and your future – and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Share your goal with your spouse, your parents and your friends. Ask them to help you create the time to write, even if it’s just 15 minutes every day. Create the habit. Good or bad, habits always deliver results. If you only write one page a day, in a year, you will have written 365 pages—more than enough for a book!

3 – Find your message. There is a book inside of you. It might be a business book, a memoir, a cookbook or something funny, a how-to or how-not to, a what-for or why-not. What are you good at? What is your passion? What can you teach other people to do?

4 – Identify your niche. Who needs to learn what you have to teach? Who would be most interested in your story? Get specific. For example, the Chicken Soup series includes Chicken Soup for the Christian Woman’s Soul, Chicken Soup for the Military Wife’s Soul, Chicken Soup for the Working Woman’s Soul and others. Knowing your niche will help you write the book and market it.

5 – Consider co-authors. Think a whole book is too much work? Get a co-author. I had co-authors on my Chicken Soup books. That person can share in the writing and, later, in marketing the book.

6 – Think marketing from day one. One of the biggest mistakes most new authors make is to spend all their time and energy writing the book, without sufficient thought to how they’ll market it. Ideally, you want to consider marketing issues while writing your book. For instance, consider short snappy chapter titles which easily lend themselves to being blog posts and/or radio/TV show segments.

7 – Meditate on problems. This might sound counter-intuitive. When you meditate, you try to relax, right? Well, not really. Meditating is harnessing your brain power and if you focus that energy on the problems you encounter – and every creative venture encounters problems – you’ll solve them. Meditate, go for a long walk or take a hot bath. Give your mind a problem to solve and give it the room to do so, and it will. That’s how I came up with the title Chicken Soup for the Soul.

 

Yes, there are other things you need to know. But the most important things are to get started, work hard and have the right mindset.

If you’d like to know the other steps, my good friend, Brian Tracy, created an at-home training program called How to Write a Book. It clearly outlines all the steps you’ll need to follow from planning to publishing a bestselling book.

Now, to help you get started, I’ll share one of my favorite quotes with you.

When oil tycoon J. Paul Getty was asked how he became one of the richest men in the world, he said, “One, get up early. Two, work hard. Three, find oil.”

To learn about meditation, check out my article,  How to Meditate for Clarity, Intuition, and Guidance.

Related Reading:

Daily Affirmations for Positive Thinking

How to Meditate for Clarity, Intuition & Guidance

How to Use Tapping Therapy To Eliminate Fear & Achieve Your Goals

Visualization Techniques to Affirm Your Desired Outcomes

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Want more free tips from on writing a book and making it a big success?  Get 3 free author training videos featuring me and Steve Harrison, who has helped over 2,000 authors promote their books. 

Twenty Years of Powerful, Inspirational Storytelling

blog - Chicken Soup for the Soul 20th anniversary edition frontTwenty years ago, I sat in meditation, waiting for inspiration about what to call the new book I had just written with my dear friend Mark Victor Hansen.

I suddenly saw the image of a huge green chalk board like the ones in school classrooms. A hand appeared—I imagined it was the hand of God—and wrote the words Chicken Soup on the chalkboard. I said to the hand, “What the heck does chicken soup have to do with this book?”

The hand replied, “When you were sick as a child, your grandmother gave you chicken soup.”

“This book is not about sick people, “ I replied.

“People’s spirits are sick. They are living in resignation, fear and hopelessness. This book will help them rise above it.”

My mind mulled that over. Chicken Soup for the Spirit, I thought. Hmmm. Chicken Soup for the Soul. Wham! All of a sudden I was covered in goose bumps. Chicken Soup for the Soul: Stories to Rekindle the Spirit!

It’s hard to believe that it’s now been 20 years since Mark Victor Hansen and I released that original best-selling book! I’m honored that it continues to bring hope, wellness, inspiration and love to hundreds of millions of people around the world.

Today, I’m very excited to announce that we have released Chicken Soup for the Soul 20th Anniversary Edition to inspire a new generation of readers with everyone’s favorite original stories, plus an additional 20 bonus stories.  This edition contains not only new stories from myself and Mark Victor Hansen, but also other powerful and inspiring stories from today’s top thought leaders.

Give the gift of Chicken Soup for the Soul 20th Anniversary Edition to a family member, a friend, or yourself. It will be a reminder of your love that will be opened and used over and over again.  

Happy Reading!

You…A Bestselling Author?

You...A Bestselling Author?

I wrote my first book, 100 Ways to Enhance Self Concept in the Classroom, back in the 1970s when I was a teacher in Chicago. But as a teacher I did not know anything about selling books.  I just wanted to make a difference and contribute my ideas to the world.

What I learned very quickly was that unless you let people know about your book, no one is going to buy it.  

Today, my hope is that I can inspire and empower people to achieve more of what they want to do, and I love sharing information that I think will help people fulfill their dreams.  That’s why my friend, Steve Harrison, and I recently teamed up to create a free video training series specifically geared toward anyone who has written a book, or wants to some day.

I’ve known Steve for years – ever since we used his company to promote Chicken Soup for the Soul. He has helped more than 12,000 authors promote their books and he is an expert at what he does. In these videos we share the strategies I’ve used to sell over 500 million copies of Chicken Soup for The Soul, launch 47 books to the New York Times Best Seller List and much more!

In this three-part series of FREE online training videos you’ll discover:

  • 8 critical things you need to know to become a successful author.
  • How to get started writing your book (and get it done quickly).
  • What it takes to hit the New York Times Best Seller List (and key mistakes
  • that prevent many authors from hitting the list even when they sell lots of books).
  • The Author’s Money Tree and ten often-overlooked ways to profit from your book.
  • The key component your book MUST include to be successful.
  • How one book generated only $35,000 in royalties but over $10 million in total revenue.
  • A common mistake that causes many authors to take FOREVER to write their books.
  • How to get celebrities to endorse your book.
  • Are you in sales, business or professional practice? How writing a book can position you
  • as an expert and help you attract paying clients pre-sold on doing business with you.
  • The four critical publishing players you need to win over to make your book successful.  
  • A strategy you can copy which generated $24,000/month in the early days of
  • Chicken Soup for the Soul.
  • 10 keys to creating a bestselling book before you finish writing it.
  • Not-so-obvious common traits of bestselling books.
  • The “bypass marketing” strategy that made Chicken Soup for the Soul a big hit.
  • How to make your book ‘media-genic’ so it naturally attracts free publicity.
  • The E+R=O formula Jack credits for his success.
  • How to craft a book which change people’s lives for the better.

So far, we’ve heard great feedback from people who have watched the videos, so if you’d like to discover how to sell a lot of copies of your book…or perhaps even one day see it on the New York Times Best Seller List, click here.  Our hope is that this video series will help you become a (more) successful author, so please enjoy!!